Grand Plan at the Kingdom by the River (10)

By Peter Jimenea/ Hole of Justice

Oplan Pagbag-o and its center wind, Team Pagbag-o, continues to make the Kingdom by the  River more colorful.

 Pagbag-o   or change is the battlecry of King Tura in the May elections and centrepiece of his governance now. The most visible sign of that is its deformed version “Oplan Pagbag-o” which is about to grab full control of the kingdom in an operation codenamed “Grand Plan”.

Kawkaw was the division handed over to Hydrocephallus last September. Kawkaw works to link the kingdom to communities. He got the post on endorsement by Bogart who yielded to the prodding of Jijimon Mutya, a cute lady strutting around selling a pair of giant melons instead of her brain. Hydrocephallus was in the media stable of Bogart and Long Legs in the election period.

Radyo Mo links the palace of the Kingdom by the River to the municipios and the other facilities of the kingdom like hospitals and the motor pool via a two-way radio. It is not a broadcast station. It merely tells to contacts to report to the palace for conference and something like that “ober-and-out”.

KIO means Kingdom Information Office headed by Ma’am Malou who would later fall victim to the machination of Hydrocephallus.

The three divisions mentioned above have been “dissolved” and merged into a “new office” called “Kawpid”. This office serves as vehicle of the “Grand Plan” to pave the way for  transition, take over actually, of power by Bogart’s henchmen. Oplan Pagbag-o or Grand Plan has been hatched by Hydrocephallus, Jijimon Mutya and Dok Kagaw on the premise that King Tura’s health is failing and may be unable to finish his term.

Kawpid is created by a mere executive order that presumes that since parliament allotted a single budget for the three combined divisions named above, a new office has been created by, of all things, the budget ordinance.

The EO was drafted by Hydrocephallus and surreptitiously slipped to the desk of King Tura. It did not pass scrutiny by Papa Dionisio, the kingdom attorney. Below the signature of King Tura is not his but that of Dok Kagaw.

The EO “appointed” Hydrocephallus as head of the Kawpid in violation of civil service rules that requires competitive screening in hiring for permanent positions, like scrutinizing applicants through the Kingdom Screening Board (KSB).

That would not have happened had the opposition in parliament, the Quintet, been on their toes. Gen, Manly, Monde, Yielo and Inday were deep asleep and did not notice that the Kawpid that was written in the executive budget proposal had no legal personality. They are party to the hilarious lapse of appropriating 9.7 million to a non-existent office.

Maybe, as of this time, Ma’am Malou had already filed her complaint before the Civil Service Commission. Maybe, too, Bord Gen already made good his promise to deliver a pribilids spits questioning the duplicity involved in the creation of Kawpid. It was actually a faux pas committed by parliament in appropriating funds for a fictitious office.

Ma’am Malou opposed the dissolution of her office and her demotion from KIO chief to Administrative Officer V. For that, Hydrocephallus, Dok Kagaw, Tibakla and Gin Butlog schemed to bring her to submission by deleting from the payroll her name and her assistant Bikya’s, and withheld the release of office supplies like bondpaper and ink that had already run out.

The two employees have been denied their salaries for February 2011 and will get them back only when they conceded to their demotion.

Hydrocephallus did succeed in executing backstage what he could not on stage. He catapulted himself to his present post by skirting the procedure of submitting himself to the Kingdom Selection Board (KSB). He lacks the needed academic credentials and work experience to qualify him.

He has no master’s degree in management, public administration or other equivalent credentials. He does not even have the civil service eligibility, not even for a “subprof”.

His only eligibility is his gut in flaunting Ritz around, his muni-muni, like what he did last Sunday, February 27, when he “prayed the holy rosary” with her inside his office at the palace of the Kingdom by the River. The guard on duty reported that he was first to arrive in the morning. Ritz came later. Both left at around 4 pm. They must have mistaken the palace for a  motel.